Time Well Spent

Sometime last year we were on vacation with friends and we passed with striking distance of Uncle Norman’s house. It was one of my friend’s Uncle Norman and, on a whim; we all stopped to visit him together. As it turned out we had a lovely visit, toured the grounds, and heard lots of interesting stories from this venerable ninety-something old man. While many of us were meeting him for the first time, all of us appreciated the value of the visit to our friend and knew what it meant to our host. I spent some time alone there, wandering through the large, overgrown yard and ended up responding with the below poem. And I got to thinking how we all have Uncle Normans in our lives who would so appreciate a visit. In fact, for many of them such a visit would make their day … or maybe their entire year. Those folks also have many stories to share, often representing the best, or even final, link to large portions of our personal and family histories. Yet, so often we’re too busy to visit, even if they live nearby. We send Christmas cards, maybe even call once in a while, but we never visit as often as they would like. The older folks especially long for our company and for our companionship, but there is more to it. That cherished visit also validates them. It sends the message that they are still important, that their lives matter because their friends and relatives still care enough to spend time with them.

Now I’m realistic. I know there are really just two kinds of people in the world: the ones who visit and the ones sit around waiting for a visit. You know who you are. If you are in the visiting half of humanity I advise that you just embrace your fortunate position, rather than resent the people who are so anxious for you to come and see them. It’s not that much trouble and it just means so much. And whether it’s your grandma, your uncle, or your own kids, just go and visit. In the end, most of us are glad we made the effort to invest in people. I hardly ever catch myself wishing I’d spent more time at work or watching TV instead spending time with friends and family. Who is your Uncle Norman? Who have you been meaning to call or go see? Here’s what I have learned from experience time and again. It’s rarely the things I do which I regret later. It’s generally the things I didn’t get around to which cause me regret in the long run. Make the call … and make the world a better place. Whatever it may cost you in time or trouble, I can guarantee it will be a good investment. Time spent on people is always time well spent.

Time Well Spent
There are always people in our lives
Whom we know we need to see
But we get so busy sometimes
That we forget how much it means
We forget how lonely they are
And what joy a visit brings
When life has us distracted
By so many other things
Yet, those older people in our lives
Have so very much to share
If we will only take the time
To call, to visit, and to care
They have so many stories
Yet to tell, and hold the key
To the wisdom of our ancestors
And our family history
They remember all the relatives
That we may never know
Saw the war and the depression
And events of long ago
They can recount mistakes made
Those they wish they could forget
So that we make better choices
And avoid what we’d regret
When we pause to call or visit
All those folks who are alone
We turn attention from ourselves
To others we have known
And show the kind of love
That honors people in a way
We hope that younger folks
Will show to us someday
Though it seems an inconvenience
We’re always happy that we went
And we’re reminded that the time we
Take to love is time well spent
By Frank Carpenter ©