The Romance of the Century

I was waiting in line at the grocery store this afternoon. Like most people, I filled that idle time looking over the photos and the headlines on the covers of the various magazines displayed there. Usually I find nothing of interest in the intellectual wasteland of those magazines, but one in particular cover caught my eye today. The new issue of Vanity Fair had a classic photograph of Elizabeth Taylor in her prime with the bold face headline, “Liz Taylor and Richard Burton, the Romance of the Century.” It all sounds very glamorous and I’m certain that a lot of folks would concur. However, especially today, I must take issue therewith. I’ve grown weary of Hollywood romance. I’m tired of all the hype, the glitz, the frenzy of interest and speculation, and often the character of those in the limelight who rarely live up to the images they project. Celebrity romance promises so much and generally delivers very little. It’s a case of people no better than you or I making below average choices in public, flitting in and out of rehab, and practically getting worshiped for it. And if they adopt a child from Africa once in a while they achieve near sainthood. Don’t get me wrong, I love kids from Africa. However, these celebrity couples are rarely more worthy of being our role models than anyone else.

Now let’s return to Liz and Richard and the supposed romance of the century. Seriously? Elizabeth Taylor was married eight times to seven different men. She was married to Richard two different times, which hardly qualifies them for that title. After all, they failed twice. I’m sorry, but Liz wouldn’t know the romance of the century if it hit her on the head. They might have shared the infatuation of the century or the divorce (s) of the century, or the public affair of the century, but the title of romance of the century certainly must belong to someone who didn’t fail at it eight times.

I suppose it boils down to a world view and our definition of love. The problem is that Hollywood’s other great contribution to society is that it has completely corrupted the meaning of the word love. We’ve been programmed to believe that love, true love, is tumultuous and tragic, that it comes and goes like flu season, and the whole story can be told in two hours. (at $10 a ticket) I cannot, I will not, believe that. True love isn’t a fickle feeling that we can fall in and out of over and over again. Genuine love is a way of life that cherishes and honors another person and builds over the course of years. If you’re really looking for the romance of the century, then start crashing fiftieth anniversary parties. That’s where you’ll find it. That’s where you’ll discover the actual experts on love. Those are the people who took their wedding vows to heart and proved out their love for better or for worse.

I’ve been married for nearly twenty-nine years to just about the most wonderful person in the world. And you know what? Our love and our life just keep getting better and I thank God for them every day. Now, I don’t think we deserve the romance of the century title because it belongs to a lot of amazing couples who have been together for twice as long as us. However, I can honestly say that during the two centuries we have had the pleasure of being a part of, I’ve felt we like were at least contenders in each one. You can’t really ask for more than that.

Today, I dedicate this poem to all those folks who have lived and loved together for a lifetime. You are the definition of the word love and the personification of romance. Liz and Richard, for all their glamour and their undeserved title from Vanity Fair, will never hold a candle to you.

Till Death Do Us Part
We seem to have forgotten
How much wedding vows mean today
So when life grows too difficult
Folks just seem to walk away
They forget about their promise
To stand through sickness and health
To stay when things were better or worse
Through poverty and through wealth
We cast aside the promises
We made back at the start
To the ultimate commitment
When we vowed, ATill death do us part@
A vow devoid of options
Which, in this world of lies
Stands as the measure of commitment
Unmarred by compromise
Those vows don=t mention happiness
Nor compatibility
Clearly, because they become subjective
When folks begin to disagree
In the end, there is no greater tribute
To what marriage is all about
Than those who stay Atill death do us part@
Who live those wedding vows out
So when your commitment is waning
And you feel love slipping away
Remember the vow you made before God
And your loved ones that long ago day
Find a way to rekindle the fires
Which once burned so bright in your heart
And stand by your promise, whatever the cost
Until death do us part
By Frank Carpenter ©